Because life is full of unexpectations

16 October 2008 at 6:16 pm (Family, Life, Love)

In few last posts I was talking about something big was going to happen soon.

Though I wasn’t really sure what that particular something big would be. Maybe your guess was marriage, wasn’t it? I did too guess so.

But it wasn’t my marriage with Ado.

It was my final goodbye to him.

It happened so drastic, I know, and it’s always been such thing in a few breakpoints in my life. I wasn’t that surprised it would happen again.

In those impossible hopes and optimists about marriage, I somehow realized that it could not happen so easy. But I was trying and pushing insanely coz I was too tired to think about it anymore. Why must love be this complicated? 

I don’t want to talk much about the event. The family, the meeting, the talks, the findings, the brainwash, the tears, the tears again, the tears again.

I love him and he loves me. He’s not perfect but he’s been wonderful enough and can always make me happy. But it doesn’t seem to be enough. At least they say so.

And I love my parents. I have to listen to them after all.

So I have to leave Ado. For good. Not just another breakup like we’ve had a few times before. It’s final and official, now that many people have been included. I will never get married when everyone is unhappy about us.

I lost my strength. I have to leave job. Leave KL.

I am now at home with my parents. I don’t want to think about anything else for the time being.

But I can’t help thinking if he’s going to be fine by himself. 

I truly wish he’ll go back to his family soon just as well. 

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Anticipation

10 September 2008 at 12:32 pm (Family, Work)

It’s lunch hour. Which lately it only seems to be rest hour instead of lunch. Apparently it’s best during Ramadan to get busier as you can forget that you’re hungry whatsoever. Oh yeah it really worked since the beginning until today I find myself free from task. What to do? Yeah read forums and news and comics.. but oh I am still bored. How I wish my apartment is just behind TPM so that I can go back having good day sleep during this break :P But I more wish the clock goes faster to hit 5pm so I can go back already.

I’m going home tomorrow. Can’t wait for it :) There’s been alot of things going on since convocation and the car and Ado and fasting month and work in between, all I really need to have a good rest at home with my parents. Ipah & Ti already went back early of this month. So now yup, me and Mama & Abah only for this weekend! Mom’s cook for breaking fast, how haevenly does it sound? :)

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Miscellaneous

5 September 2008 at 10:50 pm (Around me, Family, Graduation, Life, Whatever)

1) Convo chronicles, the end

Last Saturday I went to UIA with Ado to do my final business with UIA i.e. return the convo robe, collect photograph, collect DVD, and we took some final pictures of me in UIA wearing convo robe. Though it still turned out to be unfinished business coz I have to go back again to collect scroll as the office is only opened weekdays for this purpose. Also the commemorative book. Do people really have to take leave from office only to collect scroll at university??

2) Ado’s moving

After tons of room and house ads we’ve been checking I found one room somewhere which finally turns out to be OK for him to stay, and there goes my weekend helping him moving his stuff which are ridiculously alot more than you would expect to be a guy’s property. I mean, he’s still keeping the food mixer (and food packets) which his sister left a couple of years ago =_= and textbooks and exam papers and unnecessary lot of clothes and kitchen ware. And washing machine. And oven. Sigh. The wonderful thing about helping him to move that I have discovered many of his stuff from past and I was impressed by the fact that he actually used to be a good and organized and ambitious student!

3) Ramadan

I was only able to start my Quran reading the day before yesterday and today I made my first Tarawih prayers at nearby mosque. Not a good start, but hmm. Anyway I didn’t expect there would be alot of people in the mosque which is in the other side of the road. The imam’s reciting only short surah, and there are many children, otherwise I would enjoy my first tarawih in here.

4) Going home?

Mama keeps asking if I would like to come home during Ramadan to break fast with them. These weeks have been so hectic I hardly have time to clean room and wash clothes and day sleep so I couldnt even think of losing another weekend to go home =_= But today I found myself applying leave for next Friday so I’m going home Thursday night! :)

5) Kelisa is at it again

Hmm so I am supposed to take care of the car as my own car now despite the fact that I only afford to pay half of this month’s car payment (and I just started paying this month actually) and since lately it’s been heavily raining I have had a few times waterfall inside my car. And it’s NOT cool :( My car rooftop is leaking, how unfunny is that? I really have to go to Perodua service or sme workshop soon to let them do something with this weird phenomenon. And earlier I have spent more than RM100 to change engin oil and the wiper. I am getting poor.

6) Ado

I dont know if I should write this here, but in a few weeks he may have to leave this country if they don’t approve his visa renewal. And I fully understand if that happens and nobody will be surprised. I dont know if I should be sad or happy. I don’t want to lose him, but at the same time I would feel relieve if he goes back to his family because I honestly think he can have a good life again there.

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The Chronicles of Convocation: Post-convo mood

28 August 2008 at 12:14 pm (Family, Graduation, Life)

Hiya WordPress. I don’t know where to start. Been lazy to write. Lazy to get up. Lazy to come to work. Lazy to do work. Lazy to have lunch. Lazy to clean room. In fact, been lazy, full stop.

Please don’t take too much attention to that accidentally big-sized photo I put on last post. *blushing* I say accidentally coz I was practically fooled by that very small sized Compaq B1200 laptop belongs to Ima that I was using over the weekend when we were staying in hotel. Having been used to huge desktop screen, I couldnt really tell the image size that looked like somewhat 300×225 on that tiny 12″ laptop screen, when I was preparing for that post. And when I came back to my PC I gasped “what the hell did I put such huge photo for??”. Haiyah, but I am too lazy to change. Never mind lah.

In summary, convo was nice. But I didn’t take alot of photos as I had expected. Coz it was raining, and I hardly found my friends after the session, maybe coz we were in evening session and it ended late and everyone didn’t stay long afterwards. Only had pics with Lenya (again), and Isuma during the queuing and Akmal that I encountered on the way to cafetaria. The rest are pics of me alone and with family. And like many other girls who don’t have pocket on the dress to bring along mobile phone/camera inside the hall, my trick was to attach the mobile purse inside the convo robe :D so I was lucky to capture my own videos and pics during the convo gathering. Hehe. When I have time I’ll upload them in my Flickr :)

Ado was not there. Coz I was not sure if I should invite him. But I did send him my picture during the queuing. With a note, “wish you were here”. Which implicitly means, “wish you were here receiving your scroll too, but why you’re taking so long to finish your studies when you’re supposed to have been 2 years earlier than me??”

Umm. What else? Oh, you got to see my room new look. On the last day my parents in KL (when my sisters have already gone back to their places) they came to visit my apartment, and there goes the transformation of the room. I just hopelessly let my parents arrange stuff and furniture in my room, and Mama brought a curtain to put, and thanks to them now at least I can see some empty space in that tiny area. Happy sigh.

By the way I am not moving this time around.

I think I have some more things to write. Until next time.

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I am moving, too

8 August 2008 at 12:48 am (Family, Life)

Oh yes. Actually I have been surveying for new place as well. The idea began when Ipah has come to live here in PJ leaving only Mama & Abah at home, so we expect they’ll come to KL frequently to see their daughters here. Yeah we have uncles and aunties with their house we can tumpang here but it cant be same as own house. Though Mama has a house in Semenyih it’s rather far (1 hour) so she suggests that I buy a house. Buy a house! Ummm so I’ve been surveying some apartments like Vista Impiana and Arena Green and nearby here, though I doubt that I am already eligible to get a house loan. Mama will pay half, otherwise it won’t become possible.

But until then, I want to at least settle in a neat room somewhere nearer to TPM, given that I get up late nowadays and wish that office is only next to the apartment. My current room is now become smaller when I’m bringing more stuff inside. Plus if I have a big room it’d be okay if my family come to stay here sometimes as well.

Today I went to see a room in Petaling Indah condo. Rate is okay, but roadways is quite trivial though it’s located at the edge of highway. But somemore, the lady has cats inside house, which I dont think I can tolerate!

Tomorrow I’m going to see an apartment at Arena Green. Just called the agent this evening and he sounds quite promising :)

Ipah went home last weekend for semester break, and now she, Mama & Abah are having holiday in Kuantan while visiting Ti.

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The Chronicles of Convocation: Family gathering

23 July 2008 at 12:41 pm (Family, Graduation)

Sooooooo everyone has to be here for my convocation! Mama & Abah will be flying over here on Saturday morning,  Ima will come (still dont know how & when, cuz she changed her Kuching-KL ticket to Kuching-KB ticket to spend school holiday), Ti will probably come down by bus from Kuantan on Saturday also, and Ipah is here in PJ I can go and collect her before picking up Mama & Abah at the airport. I have booked 2 hotel rooms in KL for us to stay until Sunday morning and we’ll be off to UIA. Though I dont know how the Kelisa can be stuffed with 6 of us haha. Or maybe just like Ima’s convo last year, my aunty & uncle will be around as well so can tumpang them lah.

And the family’s official dress color for ilyani’s convocation: Dark olive green!

HMM. Anyways. Last night I was smsing with Ado, which left me a physically soft, hurt feeling inside my chest, which made me feel as if I’m short of breath, or feel like throwing up at the same time. I dont know why. And it remains until this morning. Sounds like he’s started the new semester. I haven’t seen him in a few weeks, which is good, and I want to keep it up. Sometimes I just think I am not even supposed to reply him anymore. Which I did actually, only in quite a wrong way which made him think I really wish to forget him. And all he thinks is *I* chose this to happen. Whatever.

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Surprise! Surprise!

18 June 2008 at 3:44 pm (Family, Life, Postcrossing)

Some unbelievable, unexpected news and surprises for past few days:

1) Ilyani managed to survive on her own first salary for roughly 2 weeks! Agh, and finally I have come to realize that my money is gone and I still need my parents’ help :~)

2) On Sunday Mama arrived in KL, with intention to accompany my uncles’ parents from hometown flying over to here to visit their son in hospital. Apparently Ipah turned up also, with one intention to accompany Mama, and another intention to check her status of entrance to UIA PJ. We spent some time in Semenyih, and they came to overnight in my place. On Monday I worked until afternoon and asked for unpaid half day leave, and picked Mama & Ipah to UIA PJ, and to buy bus ticket home for them. Later we went to shopping at Midvalley and I sent them to bus terminal. They’ll be coming again next week though, haha, as Ipah is registering to do Dentistry studies in UIA PJ on coming Sunday. Haih.

3) Because I am broke, Mama got to belanja me a full tank of fuel, and let me tell you, it’s RM80 now for Kelisa! Sigh, and last night the CEO of Petronas was on air in 4 TV stations but only giving excuses that they cannot do anything with the fuel price hike.

4) Kelisa’s roof top got leaked for 2 times now, and each was during heavy rain! Can you believe it? I don’t know what’s going wrong, BUT this is a CAR made after year 2000 and not some village cottage with roof made of cononut leaves! Why still got leaked? I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw flood inside my car, but after some googling I have come to know that things like this isn’t too impossible when it comes to Malaysian car! See this and this. Ugh, and they say Perodua is no 2 Malaysian top brands ranking. There’s some helpful forums they were talking about this, and I guess I have to check the rubber seal on front top. Or actually, I have to go to some workshop to get someone check for me.

5) I cleaned the fridge! Hahaha, I can’t believe myself that I really did this. But when Mama visited she was eager to do something with the fridge that I guess had never been cleaned since purchase and got frost as huge as Antarctic iceberg. None of my housemates who have been staying in this apartment for years bothered to clean the fridge, then why should I?? Hmph, but since Mama already volunteered and helped cleaning a bit, I just had no choice but to finish cleaning it until all the frost is gone and throwing out those trapped foods that have been in the fridge since YEARS! Let me tell you, there’s even some got expiry date of 2006!!!

6) I got my first birthday card from Indirama! Aww, this is too good to believe, given that I haven’t ben active on the forum so I don’t expect any card from Postcrossers this year. But hey, last year I got 30+ birthday cards and gifts from all over the world! Again I didn’t expect anyone from the forum to use my new apartment address. Too bad my camera is broken otherwise I have to show the lovely card here, and she also included a Moomin+Little My mobile phone strap, so cute! But my cheap Nokia got no hole for any strap leh, umm maybe this is a sign that I have to buy new mobile phone soon!

7) Though it’s on my birthday and I am actually too embarassed to meet Ana because she knows my stupid life stories through this blog, I’ll meet my Paulo & Ana in KL Sentral on Friday night! They’ll be heading back to Shanghai a few hours after coming back from Redang Island, so we’ll have some time to have a dinner and talk. At least that’s what Ana and I have discussed for past few days. I hope everything will be OK. And I hope they’re having a great time now in Redang island!

8) It’s confirmed: UIA convocation day for Engineering graduates will be on Monday, 25th August 2008! CANT! WAIT! FOR! IT!!!

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June the second, a sleepy day

2 June 2008 at 3:05 pm (Family, Life)

First of all, Happy birthday to Abah. I don’t know they are celebrating it today (everyone minus me!) or have already celebrated earlier, coz the other day Mama told they were having dinner something Japanese outside.

And I got my FIRST SALARY!! Whee! Which is almost gone already HAHA. So many things to buy, yet my first pay wasn’t actually a big money as I started on 5th so they deducted 4 days for this month (WTH??). Anyways. I bought a TV, though I hardly a TV fan, so it seems strange. I just thought I could make some noise in the small room at night or over the weekends rather than sleeping. Plus I want to use the electricity to the fullest, as my housemate is charging me equally as them who have always had a TV in their room. So yeah. Though it was a bit hard to choose among very limited 14 inch TVs these days as people are now producing wall-sized plasma TVs everywhere. By the way, I bought a cheap Haier (is it Chinese brand?) at Giant Bandar Kinrara.

And I feel responsible to give some of my first bucks to my parents, given that they spent alot for my preparation to start the job, the move, the interviews etc. And my sisters wanted me to pay my quarter of the internet bills I had left before. Sheesh.

And uhmmm.. I am so scared to announce it here.

I have been back with Ado.

Don’t ask me why.

Coz I have no clue myself.

But I just thought I couldn’t get angry any further and started to miss him. And he missed me. Maybe I’m just too forgiving. Maybe I feel sorry for me and him. Maybe I just practically have nobody here except him as a real friend. Or perhaps it’s really so hard to leave the first guy you ever love.

I’d better not make any emotional statement next time. I can’t trust my own words. God will punish me.

Hmm. This love story now is getting boring, you see?

Happy sigh.

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UIA revisited

28 May 2008 at 9:47 pm (Family, Life)

Hiya WordPress. I am in UIA right now. In my old hostel internet cafe to be exact. Hehe. What am I doing here? I am waiting for my laundry. Finally, I really have to come back all the way to the university to wash clothes! :P

Umm, actually, I was googling for self-service laundry nearby and there’s one that call themselves Yulek Self-service laundrette somewhere in Taman Cheras, and as I frequently go to Tesco Cheras I guessed I should try looking for this laundry. But the area turns out to be a very scarily old and crowded place and I didn’t find my luck finding the laundry. And yes, I already brought my full bag of dirty clothes!

And my second task today to do was to buy ticket to go back home this weekend. Mama wants me to be home as Ima has been back for school holiday plus we’re going to celebrate Dad’s birthday. And earlier, I was also fooled by the fake (?) internet ads, and this time was the bus ticket agent that claims to be nearby my area. I couldnt find the ticket counter! And now the laundry! What a disaster!

So I automatically came all the way to the good old Gombak area where I know that Greenwood has always had bus ticket counters, and UIA has always had laundries in the hostels! And yes, that’s what I am here now. So long story, eh?? Haha.

However, Friday tickets are all sold out. I called KTMB, trains are also sold out. I should have bought earlier. Good that Mama doesn’t mind.

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A few things

24 May 2008 at 6:36 pm (Family, Life, Postcrossing, Whatever)

1) Mama’s sms

Last night I got the funniest sms from Mama. Or rather, I know it’s either Ipah or Ti who wrote it (Mama’s hopeless at sms-ing, she’d just call). And the translation should sound a bit like this:

“Mama got Liyana’s wedding invitation. Mama is praying that you’ll find your soulmate whom I’d like. As soon as Mama comes back from hajj Mama wants to have your wedding ceremony. That’s Mama’s dream.”

Heh. And I just replied,  “Who’s Liyana??”

“Che Lah’s niece”

“Then how that got anything to do with me??”

“Stupid.”

Hahahaha. Whatever. I still can’t understand, really. Why talking about my marriage in a sudden? I know Mama has been worried. I already told her about the last breakup but I didn’t tell her about the reunite, so I guess I don’t need to tell her about another breakup. Anyway this time is for good, I promise! :~)

2) MPH shopping!

Yesterday I somehow received the email reply from MPH for my enquiry about Croatian dictionary I had asked the other day, and she said there should be a few stocks in Midvalley MPH branch, along with the ISDN number, title and price. Hmm. Should buy or not? Well it’s CROATIAN language that I’m learning now, so it has nothing to do with anyone, no? Like Zerina said I never know when the language can be useful to me. And I can still visit Croatia anyhow, and meet Sandra. OMG I dunno how to tell her in my next letter.

So I went to Midvalley today with intention to survey price of a washing machine (yes, I’m needing one now), and to MPH. And I bought the dictionary! I also wanted to buy a book to give myself a good laugh. There’s so many to choose in woman fictions (silly fictions work for me), so I ended up wandering inside the store just looking. I bought a 2008 diary too (and it’s May now :P) cuz in January I was practically doing nothing at home so I didnt need an organizer. When the job started things were too hectic I didn’t have time to find one. And at Religious section rack I stumbled upon this book “Don’t be Sad” by Aaid Abdullah al-Qarni and I was like, OMG, how come the book knows what I feel?? And it’s religious kind of self help (?), while I am hardly a fan of such book, I decided to buy one. This could be my soul remedy, who knows? Later I went to indulge my eyes at Sony Center. Jusco is having crazy SALES now, I must avoid them! And come back with more money, haha! And the Midvalley visit was nicely ended with this yummy ice mango at the Food court.

Going shopping alone and driving alone isn’t too bad though. Not that I never did those before okay? Only I should do the tyre pumping by my own from now. By the way, I’ve been trying out different roadways to KL and other places from here, so I can get familiar some more. It works better if YOU are driving rather than having someone to drive for you, no? :-)

3) Postcrossing survival kit

Since the work PC blocks Postcrossing site and forum (why??), and I didn’t bring my PC to the apartment, the only way I can do is to tag and request address (it’s 10 addresses I can request now!! Ugh!) when I am back home. Got to print out the addresses, shop for some stamps, and postcards, and those are my Postcrossing Survival Kit to bring to KL! I can write and send postcards whenever I have time then, and post from here. But until today, I STILL DON’T KNOW WHERE THE POST OFFICE IS IN THIS AREA!! The Wikimap doesn’t help. I heard there’s a PO in Sg Besi but still can’t find it. I should ask help from fellow Postcrossers. Oh and I can only surf the forum when I have time to visit the internet cafe. Sigh.

4) Washing machine

I need to buy a washing machine. I cannot go and wash clothes in aunty’s house cuz it’s school holiday now and they balik kampung. And I didn’t find any luck so far in finding self service laundry here. I have been surveying washing machines in Midvalley’s Carrefour and a shop in Cheras (just to see price, I can go to nearby stores for real purchase). Someone said he bought a second hand one in Courts Mammoth Cheras, maybe I should go and see there as well.

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